All I want for Xmas is to see better

I have been having some issues with my left eye for a while now.. My first doctor said I had some hazing on the lens of my eye. I went to another doctor for a second opinion, who told me that I had a cataract in my eye (this is very rare for some one in their early 40's). At that time I was having some issues with my vision, but I could deal with it.. Most recently the issues with my vision have been interfering with my life and work. My night vision, which has been never great, is much worse, I don't drive at night at all anymore. And most importantly seeing to paint or tattoo is becoming more and more of a problem. I am finding myself squinting and straining my eyes to focus. Which isn't working  as the cataract is clouding my vision more and more.. here is an example of what I am seeing..

 As you can imagine this is totally freaking me out. I rely on my vision for my job and my art.. So off to the doctor I went again to discover that I am a good candidate for cataract surgery. I do have health insurance but 2 problems, Firstly I have a $4000 deductible, I will not meet this deductible so I will pay for the entire surgery out of pocket. Secondly the better lens (and why not get the best lens for my eyes? they are very important) is $2500 and not covered by insurance. I will be needing to save up a bit to afford the surgery and the time off of work while healing.. Luckily I will only miss a couple days of work to get the surgery and heal. They have come a long way in eye surgery..
So I will be having a sale on my website to raise money for my surgery.. I don't want any handouts, but if you were going to get some of my art, this would be the time to do it..Many larger pieces will be cut significantly and any money you spend will go toward my surgery. Go here for the sale www.misha-art.com. We start the sale Saturday November 26th and running it thru the holidays in hope this can help me get my surgery early next year. Thanks to all of you who have been supportive of my art in the past and in the future.

I wish I could draw

     I was talking to my Mom a few months back, she and my sister had started taking watercolor classes. She was telling me that she was frustrated that she couldn't draw that well. And that she wished she had the ability that I had to draw.. I told her that she does have the ability, she just needs to practice. I find it funny how many people think that artists just pick up a pencil and magic just flows from it, it doesn't work that way.. A runner wouldn't expect to run a 20 mile marathon if they never trained. They train and run smaller marathons, building up to the big one. An artist needs to do the same thing, they need to draw... A LOT. There will be many bad drawing some good and even a few amazing drawings. But you need to train you hands to move the pencil. You need to train your eyes to see what is really there and how to make it look like that on paper. I draw everyday, some of the drawings are for work and some are for me and the more I do it the better I get. I have my old sketchbooks and occasionally I will take them out just to see how far I have come.

      I have a theory that most people can draw, but what they don't do is draw.. They are so intimidated by the blank sheet of paper, that they never begin.. So don't be afraid of the paper, when you get it, scribble on it.. Now does the scribble look like anything? See if you can make the scribble become something.. Or maybe you will work better taking out a simple object ( like a piece of fruit or a cup) and drawing it again and again.. you will see with each drawing you are getting better and better at making it look like what you want or even get it to look like what it is..

So do it, pick up a pencil or marker or crayon and just start. You can draw, you just have to try.

Spoons!!!!

My friend Alana and I are both workaholics and have both worked ourselves sick. She and I both try to keep an eye on each other making sure the other isn't overdoing it. But how to do so with out sounding like a nag?  Then my friend Bensen posted The Spoon Theory http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory-written-by-christine-miserandino/ ( I am not copying it , as per the request on the website. But go and read it, it will change how your view on chronic illness). Reading the Spoon Theory made me realize that even tho I do not have chronic illness, we all only have so many spoons everyday and if we use them all up we make ourselves susceptible to the effects of stress and getting sick. Think of each spoon as a bit of energy you use up and you only get so many spoons each day, once they are gone they are gone and if you use more than you have, you will have even less the next day.

So now Alana and I will ask each other "How are your Spoons?" or suggest things to each other to do to replenish spoons. Reading this article gave me the ability to access where I really am. Have I used up all my spoons? Do I have enough spoons to do this? and remind myself that if I use up all my spoons I won't have enough energy to fight off colds and keep healthy...

So make sure not use up all your spoons!

I can be anything I want, I cannot do everything

When I was little I was told I could be anything I wanted. Children in American hear this again and again especially  girls. They tell us this because many of our families came from places with no choices, places that limited who you could be. Being born poor or a different skin color or female could limit how far you could aspire. So the Dream of being anything is ingrained in us Americans. It is a wonderful concept, but in it's actual application it isn't quite so easy. I fear many of us has confused "you can be anything you want" with "you can do everything". I know this first hand, because I am now suffering from the effects of confusing the two ideas.

I am an artist and I actually make my living at it. I tattoo 4 days a week and the other 3 days I work from my home studio painting and doing freelance design. But because I have been living "You can do everything",  I am not really living my life. I work most days of the week and even when I am not actually working the things I need to get done just hang over me.  I don't really enjoy my social time, I am thinking about what I have to do next, not being there in the moment. I am trying so hard to work toward a life I want, that I'm not really living my life at this moment. The fall out is pretty awful. I have let my friendships wither because I have no time to be with my friends. I have high blood pressure and ocular migraines. I have gained considerable weight due to stress, lack of movement and eating my way thru the stress.

Stress?? I know some would say, what stress? You have so much going for you. And I do have so many great things in my life; a 24 year relationship with my husband, I do what I love for a living, I work for wonderful bosses. I love where I live (my apartment, my neighborhood).. All these this are wonderful, how can I be stressed? The answer is that not all stress is bad stress. I know my stress is the one of overabundance of opportunity. I have so many things I can be doing, so many opportunities that have come my way and I am grateful for them. But I am only one person and cannot do them all. I am so afraid I will say no to the one thing that will take me to the next level in my career, that I don't want to say no to anything.. I guess I need to realize it's not saying no to opportunities, but saying yes to having a life. As my sister-in-law Donna once asked me "Are you a human Doing or a human Being?" I unfortunately have been a human Doing..

 So now that I have seen the problem and named it what to do now?
It looks like it's time to begin living.. I have to figure out a way to balance my career and my life. Eating healthier, get more movement (exercise) into my life, make time to reconnect with friends. And learn how to shut off the voice in my head that is constantly updating me on what I still have to get done.. I need to remember to say NO once in a while. Not to everything, but when my schedule is full already, don't take on more than I can actually do.  And most importantly I need to remember that although I can be anything I want, I cannot do everything, I am only one person. Time to be a Human Being

Copying is not flattery

They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.. And that it may be, but trying to copy something and pass it off as your own is just stealing!
It was brought to my attention yesterday that 2 people were copying my work and selling it on etsy.  This is even more annoying since I am struggling financially and they are making money off my efforts. After looking around on etsy my Husband found several more people who had just copied the images off the internet and we making things with them to sell or in one case they painted copies and sold them. All of  these images were from a series I did for the 35th birthday celebration for Hello Kitty. I can't even make things out of these designs because the copyright is held by Hello Kitty's parent company Sanrio. I would need their permission first. I did 9 paintings for the event and several of them were my interpretation of some old masters paintings. There is a big difference between using another persons art as reference to create your own original piece of art and doing a copy and passing it off as your work.

Here is an example of stealing. And the kicker here is this person had the balls to say the image was copyrighted to her!

Here is an example of doing your own version. I wanted it to have the look and feel of the original so you would know which old masters painting I was referencing, it was the point of the painting. 

If someone were to do an homage to one of my pieces I would be flattered, especially if the mentioned referencing my work. But if they are copying my art and passing it off as their own, not so much. When I was in art classes we would occasionally copy an old masters piece (you can learn quite a bit from making a copy). But I would never have tried to pass off the piece I was learning from off as my own work. 

Some may say "But Misha you have done the Last Supper several times in your work, Isn't that a copy of the original?" and I would say yes I have Used the Last Supper many times and in each case I have used the well known painting to convey a message. The more some one knows the original the more they get my little jokes in the piece. It is very obvious that I am referencing and not making a copy.

I know that if I put my art out there on the internet it will run the risk of being stolen, it is a risk I have to take to get my work to be known. And in a way the fact some one thought my work was good enough to make them money is a bit of a compliment. But the fact is that if you takes someone elses work and make a profit from it, you are stealing. 

So you want to be a Tattoo Artist..

I am constantly getting emails from people wanting to become a tattoo artist.

     Let me start by saying tattooing is a full time job, not a hobby you can do on the side. You need to do it consetenly to be any good at it. And if you are making a permanent mark on some one you better be good at it!

Apprenticeship vs self taught...
     There is always someone out there who wants something for nothing. They don't want to pay for the education they would be getting with an Apprenticeship. They think, "Hey! How hard can it be? I can copy stuff". I believe I spoke those words 20 years ago, it was so much harder than I thought it would be. I got my equipment with the help of another tattoo artist and he gave me the basics. My first few were not so bad, but not so good either. I have many people from those early days to thank for letting me learn on them. I even got into a shop tattooing clients with in several weeks of starting because of them. But in reality I wasn't very good  and I couldn't understand why I wasn't good. I could draw and copy things, why weren't my tattoos looking as good as my drawings? I really needed to get guidence. As many of my friends were trying to convince me to open my own shop, I got the oppurtunity to take an apprenticeship with Miz Jo-D Bones. It would cost me several thousand dollars and I would be driving 40 miles from home every day to do it. I looked at my work versus her work and I knew I had to do it! What I learned in the first 6 months Apprenticing was more than I had learned in the first 2 years working pretty much on my own in a shop. I knew I made the right decision. Thanks Jo-D!

     Now you may think you can do it without an a apprenticeship, but first you should consider all you need to learn:  how to draw up a tattoo design, how to plan for the way a tattoo will look over time, how to work with clients, the technical skill of putting needle to skin and most importantly how to work safely and cleanly. Lets deal with each of these individually:

How to draw up a tattoo design... When drawing the tattoo design you will need to know what to put in the drawing and what you don't really need. The drawing will not only show your client what you are planning to do, but will also give you a map to follow on the skin once you make it into a stencil. The stencil is very important, as the skin will stretch and move as you are tattooing it.The stencil will stay on the spot of the body you want the ink to be in. Learning how to draw a useful map, the stencil, with the right information, and not so much information as to confuse you while tattooing, is vital.

How to plan for the way a tattoo will look over time: Tattoos are not just for today, they are for the life of the client. You want your work to look good in the future as well as the present. You need to learn how the skin changes over time so you can plan you design accordingly. Next to names, the biggest things I cover up are tattoos done too small and too detailed. Many an inexperienced artist will do a tattoo with too many tiny lines too close together. Human skin is a living surface and will change and shift over time, you need to take this into consideration when doing the tattoo.

How to work with clients.. Dealing with clients is more important than you can imagine. Tattooing used to be: go into a shop, pick design off wall, and get it tattooed as is.. Times have changed (in my opinion for the better) for both artist and client. So now you need to learn how to do a consultation, to find out what the client wants and to manage their expectations of what is possible.  Learning how to say "no" nicely, and explain why, is vital. Trying to do something you know won't work just because they want it that way can be a nightmare for both client and artist. There is also dealing with clients during the tattoo. How to sit them so they won't move as much.  How to sit them so you can get at the area to be tattooed and not kill your back (a lifesaver of a skill). How to deal with a client who is in a lot of pain during the tattoo, and what to do if some one passes out.

The technical skill of putting needle to skin... This is what everyone is dying to learn, when they start out.  But even this is not as easy as it sounds. First and foremost you should be able to draw before even trying to tattoo, and just because you are good in one medium doesn't mean you will be good immediately in another. It takes time to learn how the equipment works. The first time you picked up a pencil you didn't do a perfect drawing. But as you drew more and more you got better. It the same with tattooing. You will need to do lots of mediocre tattoos before you do great ones. Having a teacher will be very important in helping you understand the way your machines work, how to use color and shading to get the effects in the skin you want. A teacher will help you be a better tattoo artist quicker.

How to work safely and cleanly... This is the first thing you should learn. A dirty artist is health risk for themselves, their clients and everyone who works with them. There are bloodborne pathogens classes out there, but few have the specifics for our industry. You need to learn not just how bloodborne pathogens are transmitted, but also how you can specifically protect yourself and your clients from transmitting them..( Side note: because of what I know from tattooing I am so surprised how many doctors, nurses and dentists are working dirty. I have seen more cross contamination in a dentist office than I ever have in a tattoo shop.)

These skills can't be googled, they need to be learned from a teacher who can see if you are doing it right and correct what you are doing wrong before it becomes a bad habit..

Tattoo Schools
    There is much talk these days about tattoo schools. The two I know of offer 2 week courses to be certified. Lets start off with this certification means nothing, in fact many tattoo shops will NOT hire people from these schools because they will not be properly trained and don't want to encourage these schools to continue. The fact is these schools are a money making scheme to benefit the schools owner. The poor students sign on thinking they are getting proper certification that will help them get jobs and they think they are getting proper training. The worst part is because the word "school" is used is seems more legit than paying an individual to do an apprenticeship. This couldn't be further from the truth.  Apprenticeships generally last 2 years and in that time you get one on one student / teacher time. The schools can't possibly teach you everything you need to know in 2 weeks. Think about an apprenticeship as an education (which it is) like if you were to train in a trade school. Trade schools don't crank people out in 2 weeks. They are usually 1-2 years of classes before you can take a test and be certified. I think the apprenticeship process works best, but if the tattoo schools were run more like a trade school, I could see it might work for some. As for a 2 week school, all that  would be able to do is give an overview with little practical training, and of course emptying the students pockets.

How Do you Find an Apprenticeship?
     This is a tough one and one of the reasons that the tattoo schools are getting any students at all. It is very hard to find an artist willing to take on an apprentice. I have turned down several potential students myself. The fact is, taking on an apprentice is a very difficult and time consuming job. The reason apprenticeships are not free is that it is actual work for the teacher. It costs them time and money that they could be making doing tattoos themselves instead of teaching the apprentice.
    Finding your teacher will be the toughest part. I was lucky that I was getting tattooed by Miz Jo-D and we were discussing my situation, she saw potential in me that needed directing. So she asked if I wanted to apprentice. Getting tattooed by the artist you want to work with is one way of building a rapport with an artist to see how you would get along as student and teacher, but it does not guarantee it. I would start by talking to your tattoo artist, if you are not getting tattooed or don't have any tattoos you may want to ask yourself why you want to do this? To be honest I don't know of any tattooist that would take someone with no tattoos as an apprentice. I know I would never get tattooed by someone who doesn't have a tattoo. They don't need to be covered in them, but they need to have a feeling of what I, as a client, is going through.

Paying for an apprenticeship
I don't know what the going rate is now, but don't expect it for free. In the old days you were basically a slave to the rest of the shop to pay your way. Nowadays things are different, many of the jobs you did back then helped save time for your teacher (making needles, making ink, scrubbing and sterilizing equipment) are no longer needed due to pre-made pre-sterilized needles, pre-sterilized disposable tubes and pre-made high quality ink. But you will always be expected as the low person on the totem pole to sweep and mop the floors, clean the bathroom and do small errands as well as paying for the apprenticeship.

What to expect from the apprenticeship
This is something you will want to make sure you and your teacher are on the same page about. As a student you may not know everything you are to be taught, but you should have some idea of how it will work. I was already tattooing by the time I started my apprenticeship so I started tattooing in her shop right away. We scheduled days that I would come in and just observe my teacher. I also had to photograph each and every tattoo I did so we could do a critique.  Unfortunately there are some people out there who will take your money and teach you nothing, so definitely get to know this person first. Make sure they will follow through on what they agreed to teach you and that you will both work together. Also, remember to be humble, it is hard to keep hearing what you are doing wrong, but that is what you are paying for. You need to know how to do things right and sometimes you will make mistakes, a lot of them. Your teacher is there to help you learn from the mistakes and help you to not make them again.

This is just a skimming of the surface about learning to tattoo, but I hope some of this helps answer questions out there.

my 20th Anniversary of tattooing

August 1991 I picked up my first tattoo machine. There were very few women in tattooing at that time and I got lots of "oh honey that's cute, you want to tattoo'.. I ignored the condescending comments and found a tattoo artist who was willing to get me some equipment and give me the basics..Thanks so much Sicko for helping me get my start and thanks to my Brother and to my Husband for helping me finance my first machines. I began by tattooing my friends who were kind enough to let me practice on them (thanks Ya'll).  2 years of tattooing and not really knowing what to do and I was getting frustrated. I had a job in a shop, but knew I could be doing better, I knew my tattoos could be so much more. Luckily Miz Jo-D Bones who had been tattooing me offered me an apprentiship, I would be taking a step back and have to come up with several thousand dollars to pay for it. But I knew I needed it to be better, so I talked to my Dad and he said that he and Mom thought my apprentiship was an education, so they would help me pay for it..  What I learned in the first 6 months was more than I had learned in the first 2 years. That step was a leap forward..

Here is a picture of  My first tattooing attempt.  I tattooed 2 grapefruit and then took them to the first Lollapalooza. I was so punk rock my fruit was tattooed!

New Beginnings

Life has been kinda crazy this year. I moved to Thai town, Was in a number of art shows and had a table in Artists alley for Comic Con.. All of which meant that I have been working nonstop!
Today is the first real day off in ages. A day that I am not home sick or have a huge list of errands to do or any of that.. I can do what I want, when I want to.. So what do I do? Start a Blog..
Not sure how I want to do this.. Random musings? Art tutorials? pictures of my pets? I guess the blog will just happen naturally and I will do what feels right at the time..

I used to post a blog on SuicideGirls for years. I really loved their format, but their not safe for work format just meant I never had time to be on it.. So I moved on to Facebook, which doesn't let you post more than 420 characters unless you make it a note and no one reads them. I just moved on to G+ I think I like it better than FB but time will tell. Being on G+ made me realize how much I really just wanted to be able to write what ever and post pictures and people can read it or ignore it, but I could go back later and read it all in one place..

So here is a picture of my pet Rats: Areyn Sun, LeeLooDallas and Squeek (aka the Grim Squeeker)